Coping With Loneliness - Finding a Real Friend

Coping With Loneliness - Let Down & Turned Away
Coping with loneliness is often a byproduct of facing one of life's challenges. Your friends may not understand what it feels like to be in your situation unless they've been in that circumstance themselves. Perhaps they don't comprehend your challenges and may not know how they can help you. Therefore, your closest friends may let you down or turn their backs on you. My friends did. My life challenge is chronic pain. I developed a severe arm injury and was no longer capable of working in the manner in which I had previously worked. In spite of an exhaustive job search, I lost the career that I dearly loved.

Coping With Loneliness - Devastated & Alone
As I was coping with loneliness, it was hard not to compare my fate to that of Job from the Bible, with the loss of so many things that I held dear. Like Job, I had friends that were no friends at all. In the beginning, some were like Eliphaz and offered advice with statements like, "Strengthen your faith - just trust in God!" I was trusting God. However, that answer was not specific enough to help me find the solutions I needed at that time. God's grace is sufficient to meet all of our needs. However, that doesn't mean that the timing or the answers will be what we expect. In retrospect, I can see that God had moved on my behalf in all of the events that took place during this deep, dark valley of my life. But at the time, I was struggling to hear God's voice or see Him work, because the answers were not what I was seeking or expecting.

Later, Job's friends said that he needed to examine himself and find out where he had sinned so that he could repent of that sin. My friends did the same thing. Job's friends weren't specific about his sin, but mine were. They accused me of falsifying my arm symptoms and claiming fraudulent funds from my employer and the government. I wanted to ask them where they got their medical degrees? I wanted to ask them if they thought all six of my treating physicians would lie and jeopardize their licenses for me? I was very hurt that they would accuse me of lying and fraud, but mostly that they would think so little of my Christian witness. But all I could do in my defense was quote Proverbs 5:21: "For a man's ways are in full view of the Lord, and He examines His paths." Erroneously, the world far too often equates health and prosperity with God's blessings; and suffering and pain with God's judgment.

I was devastated when these friends (who had known me for over 25 years) decided they didn't trust my honesty, integrity or Christian witness enough to stand beside me as my friends. I was deeply hurt by this rejection. And since this had been my social group, I felt very much alone.

Coping With Loneliness - The One Who Understands
As I was coping with loneliness at a very deep level, I was reading my Bible. It was there that scripture reminded me that the same thing happened to Jesus Christ in His darkest hour in the Garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-46). He was all alone. Over the next several days, every time I felt discouraged or alone, I would open my Bible and it was as if words would jump right off the pages -- words that were specifically placed there to comfort me in my situation. Jesus met me in my need, at my point of pain.

I found comfort in the fact that Jesus experienced everything that we experience, and He knows exactly how we feel. He can comfort us because He's been there too. He promises to never leave us nor forsake us. He promises to stick closer to us than a brother. He says that if we call for help, He will say, "Here am I!"

culled from:http://www.allaboutlifechallenges.org/coping-with-loneliness.htm

............hearing the voice of God

The writer of Hebrews tells us that we can train our ear to recognize the voice of God above all the noise. "But solid food belongs to those who are of full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil" (Hebrews 5:14). It is by practicing, by reason of use, that we are able to discern whether what we hear is of God, our flesh, or the Devil.

Isaiah 30:21 says, "Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, "This is the way, walk in it," Whenever you turn to the right hand or whenever you turn to the left."

So God will speak, and you can hear His voice, but you must be careful -- especially when you are a young Christian -- that you objectively confirm that you are following the Holy Spirit and not another voice. Our own flesh can scream pretty loud (especially when we are under pressure, or we want something very badly). And the Devil is the father of lies -- he is the great deceiver.

So how can we know whether we're hearing the voice of God? The Bible gives us seven basic keys or filters through which every possible leading should be judged. We are to carefully examine the thoughts and intentions of our hearts -- and the words of godly people who may have influence on us by their words and actions -- through the use of these seven keys:

• Scripture: "All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work" (II Timothy 3:16-17).
  
  
• The Holy Spirit speaking to our heart: "For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, says the Lord: I will put my laws into their minds, and I will write them on their hearts. and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. And they shall not teach everyone his fellow citizen, and everyone his brother, saying, 'know the Lord,' for all will know Me, from the least to the greatest of them" (Hebrews 8:10-11).
  
  
• The Prophetic (word of knowledge, word of wisdom, personal prophecy): "Do not quench the Spirit; do not despise prophetic utterances. But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good" (I Thessalonians 5:19-21).
  
  
• Godly counsel: "Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety" (Proverbs 11:14).
  
  
• Confirmation: "By the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed" (Matthew 18:16).
  
  
• The peace of God: "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful" (Colossians 3:15).
  
  
• Circumstances/Timing: "After these things he (Paul) left Athens and went to Corinth. And he found a certain Jew named Aquila, a native of Pontus, having recently come from Italy with his wife Priscilla, because Claudius had commanded all the Jews to leave Rome. He came to them, and because he was of the same trade, he stayed with them and they were working; for by trade they were tent-makers" (Acts 18:1-3 -- this relationship between Paul, Aquila and Priscilla -- which happened as a result of circumstances -- became one of the most important strategic partnerships in the book of Acts).

Many times the Lord will confirm His direction to us through three, four or more of these keys -- especially when we are in the process of making an important, life-changing decision.

The bottom line, as Pat Robertson has said for years, is that big decisions take big prayer. In other words, as we humble ourselves before the Lord, seek His guidance in our lives, the Good Shepherd will be faithful to lead us, "…in paths of righteousness for His name's sake" (Psalm 23:3).

The New Testament talks of the early disciples -- people like Paul, Aquila and Priscilla -- as people who heard the voice of God. My friend who wrote the e-mail will be happy to know that this was the report made of them:

"These who have turned the world upside down have come here too" (Acts 17:6b).

Yes, you can hear and know the voice of God. And because of this the world is changing -- more than perhaps you've heard.

Hearing and doing God's Unction.

Hearing God's Voice - Are You Ready to Listen?
Hearing God's voice is something we all long for-but did you know that it's not hard to do? In fact, God wants you to hear His voice! He doesn't speak to us through a quiver in our liver or through vibes or mediums. Hearing the voice of God is as natural as hearing your best friend talk to you. What's more, we can hear Him everyday and not just on special occasions or by chanting special incantations. He speaks to us in the natural moments of life. Do you want to hear God's voice? Then you must be ready to listen.

Hearing God's Voice - Why Do You Want to Hear Him?
Why do you want to hear God's voice? That may sound like a silly question, but motives are important in anything we do. The Bible says this about God's Word: "For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." (Hebrews 4:12)

Do you want to hear God's voice? If you do, it's possible you're hearing Him already, for He may be the one giving you the longing to hear Him.

Hearing God's Voice in the Bible
In his book Knowing God, J. I. Packer says, "God has spoken to man, and the Bible is His Word, given to us to make us wise unto salvation."

The Bible itself declares, "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God" (John 1:1). In another place, we read: "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness." (2 Timothy 3:16).

You may hear people say that the Bible is just a book written by men, but the Bible itself claims to be God's Word! Can we rely on it? The evidence of history, archaeology, fulfilled prophecy and personal testimony over thousands of years is overwhelming that the Bible is, indeed, God's Word. Do you want to hear God's voice? Then read the Bible. Find a good daily reading plan, and stick to it.

Hearing God's Voice through Prayer
When you want to have a conversation with someone, how do you begin? Do you stand in front of the person and hope they will talk to you? That might work, if the other person is outgoing enough, but usually we begin a conversation by opening our own mouths and talking, engaging the other person's attention. It's the same with God! He loves to hear us talk to Him, and it's in those moments that we prepare ourselves to hear the voice of God. Prayer is like saying, "Hello, God, it's me. I believe You created me and that You know way more about how I should live my life than I do. I'd like to get to know You better. Here's what's going on in my life, and I'd sure like Your thoughts on how to handle it. Would You please speak to me about this today?"

In an ordinary conversation, we speak, then listen for the response of the other person. It's the same with God! Once we've prepared our hearts to listen through prayer, we're more likely to hear the voice of God. Does He speak to us through an audible voice? Some claim He does, but usually that's not the case. We may not actually "hear" the voice of God, but He speaks to us in many ways. Here are some of them:

• God speaks through His Word
• God speaks through our thoughts
• God speaks through conversations with others
• God speaks through circumstances

Hearing God's Voice through Jesus
The Bible also tells us that Jesus is God in the flesh. Therefore, if you want to hear the voice of God, you must study and know the teachings of Jesus. Here's how John describes Him: "That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched - this we proclaim concerning the Word of life." (1 John 1:1). You must also have a personal relationship with Jesus. Have you ever tried to carry on a conversation of any depth with a person you did not know? It doesn't usually go very far.

Shortly before He was crucified, Jesus met with His disciples to reassure them of what would happen after He was gone. He promised them a helper: "And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever - the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you." (John 14:16-17). The Holy Spirit, then, is the fulfillment of the way we hear God's voice!

Hearing God's Voice with the Help of the Holy Spirit
"But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you." (John 14:26). The second chapter of Acts describes the events that occurred on the day of Pentecost, after Jesus ascended into Heaven. Verse 3 says they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, the Counselor promised by Jesus. This unique aspect of God's personality did not come to them as someone they could see and touch, but rather He came to live inside them. That same Spirit is available to you and me today. Are you a Christian? If so, you already have the Holy Spirit available to you. Ask God for a fresh filling everyday, and He will prepare your heart to hear God's voice. His Spirit, that still, small voice inside you, is the One who will remind you of what God said, and help you recognize God's opportunities in your life.

Hearing God's Voice - Conclusion of the Matter
So we have the Bible, prayer, Jesus, the Holy Spirit and our own hearts to help us in hearing God's voice. Do you want to hear God's voice? That is the final question, for God responds to willing hearts. In the book of Revelation, we read: "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me." (Revelation 3:20). God will never force you to obey Him, but waits for your willing response to His call. Are you hearing His voice right now? Don't let your final answer be the wrong one.